Making the decision to sell a business that consumed my last 16+ years was a difficult one. I had the type of job that others envied. I looked forward to going to work every day – until…
…about 10 months after the economy tanked
It was then I took a long hard look at the fiscal future of my company. Where I used to see 9-12 months of future business, I saw what looked more like 3 months. What happened next happened to a lot of small businesses – layoffs, office downsizing, and redirection. But the problem with my business was not specifically related to the economic downturn. It was related to the changes in regulatory requirements making business difficult for my clients, thus impacting my business. After staving off disaster for another couple of years, I realized that I no longer looked forward to going to work. It became a chore; kept me up at night with worry; and generally was disheartening.
When a colleague shared an interest in taking over, it did not take me a long time to decide. Was it difficult to leave this baby of mine, now into its difficult teen years? A little yes…mostly no. The hardest part was in making the decision, not in the leaving.
So deal done, business sale closed, 10-month employment contract executed and completed. Yay!! Now what? I started with several assumptions…
…I’ll get another job easily
Upon embarking on this “down time”, I had no concerns that another job would soon be on the horizon. I still had some ongoing consulting and teaching positions that could ensure that I would not lose my edge. I was not yet ready to join the ranks of those seeking employment as, frankly, I was tired. I needed to regroup, recharge, and restore my sense of self. After an in-depth review of our financial plan with our financial adviser, my husband and I decided we were okay. This would not hurt us in the long run. My husband anticipated about a 3-month break. I was thinking more like two. Our financial adviser told us that she had rerun the numbers with me being out for a full year, and we were still fine. Well that is nice to know, but there is no way I will be out of work for a year! So, no worries.
…The one thing I know how to do is relax
It’s true. I do not hesitate to stop in the middle of vacuuming, sit on the couch and peruse a magazine that I noticed sitting on the coffee table. Vacuuming can be finished later. I am not a type A personality when it comes to chores. My siblings do not hesitate to remind me of my habit of needing to visit the bathroom right after dinner to avoid clearing the dishes and loading the dishwasher. Laundry can become an all day affair, as I tend to forget to move the clothes from the washer to the dryer, or from the dryer to the clothes basket, or, to my husband’s chagrin, the folded clothes to the drawers and closets. This does not mean that I am a slob. I can spend quite some time washing, drying, and polishing my black granite countertops (those with these countertops understand my passion).
However, after years of long workweeks, those moments of avoiding chores did n
ot seem to hold the same sway. Chores became my way of taking up the time. In fact, I began to see my chores as my work, doing extensive web research on best practices in housekeeping! Seriously?? Yes, seriously.
So what is this relaxation I craved? What does it look like? Sleeping in? Nope, I haven’t been able to sleep past 6:10 a.m. in years. Getting to bed earlier? No way, too boring! What does one do, when one no longer does what one used to do?
One naps! There is something very special about curling up on the couch and allowing yourself to nod off without guilt. But that is the key, isn’t it…no guilt? Come on! I am a woman, a Catholic, a nurse – guilt is felt to my core!
…I will take advantage of this time to exercise!
Ah, to have the time to properly exercise. Ah, to have a gym in my building making it so very easy to access. The Mayo Clinic lists 7 benefits of regular physical activity. This is information I know. I am a nurse. I have counseled others on the benefits of regular physical activity.
So why can’t I get motivated? I have become a couch potato. I have binged on all the Netflix series, (Orange is the New Black an all time favorite); I have been introduced to Shonda Rhimes and all her pop culture hits; and I have discovered other networks with odd shows such as Married at First Sight.
I will delve into my long-term issue with exercise motivation in another blog. Please share your thoughts on my musings, on your post work experiences, or ideas to help me get motivated!